Want a Cocktail? Get Old Fashioned

50ml Whiskey (not whisky, there's a difference). Preferably bourbon, rye is equally as good. Basically, any whiskey from America or Canada. Don't go too fancy though because then you're losing the point.

If you're reaching above Woodford Reserve for your whiskey, you're wrong and should feel bad. If you're putting Pappy Van Winkle in there, you make terrible financial decisions and can I go for a drink with you?

1 Dash Angostura Bitters

2 Dash Orange Bitters

Either 1 brown sugar cube, crushed and muddled until its a paste

Or 7.5ml brown sugar syrup (it is a real time saver but if you're making it for yourself, just take that time and enjoy it)

In a mixing glass, crush the sugar cube. It helps to add a couple of drops of water to make the paste.

Once the paste is made, dash in the bitters

Pour in 25ml of your choice of whiskey

Add a few cubes of ice and stir in a circular motion. Don't batter it, make a tiny whirlpool

Add the other 25ml of whiskey and more ice. As much as you can while still being able to stir it

Stir for about 3-4 minutes. The way I do it is I hold the top 3/4 of the mixing glass, once that feels ice-cold, you're good to go.

Get a Rocks Glass and add one massive ice cube

Hawthorne strain the drink over

Garnish with an orange zest, squeeze it over first so the oils spread across the drink.

In starting this blog, I wasn't sure which cocktail would really set the tone.

I've made a few drinks in my day, created a few cocktails, and made some atrocious mixes.

Which cocktail do I want to be known as? You know what I mean; everyone has that drink which, when you see it on the menu you go "Hmm, so and so would like that".

For example, if I'm in a bar and I see a gin I don't recognise I'll remember it for my mother. She's not a lush, she's an aficionado.

Or if there's a ridiculously sweet cocktail which is garnished with half a tuck shop, it's got Conor written all over it.

When I see Red Stag, it reminds me of the time Holly tried, and failed, to out drink me. Go throw up in the bathroom you weak, weak woman.

What would my drink be? (You've read the title of this, you know the answer)

There's just something about an Old Fashioned that I love. It's simple, elegant and it works. 3 ingredients. That's all it takes.

Whiskey, sugar, bitters; give it a stir and away you go.

However, despite its simplicity, it is incredibly easy to screw up.

The main culprit in this is the ice. It seems like such a small part of the drink but it makes a massive difference. I've had Old Fashioneds with pretty much every type of ice there is and I will say, if you haven't got a big block of ice, don't use it. Just strain it into the glass and leave it. You're butchering my drink, you heathen!

A big ole chunk of ice in an Old Fashioned keeps it cool so that you can sip it, but it doesn't water it down so you have to neck it. It's a cocktail, not 50p sambuca from Yate's (oh god, the memories).

Here's how you drink an Old Fashioned:

Put on a suit. This is non-negotiable. Ladies, its the 21st Century, throw on a suit and let the good times roll.

Sit down in a fairly comfy chair. Nothing too luxurious. Armchairs are for brandy and laughing at poor people. Sofas are for beer and pizza. Office chairs are for vodka and crying.

I'm talking a wooden chair, butt grooves from years of use, padding on the back which is just ornamental at this point, one leg slightly shorter than the other 3 but you can't figure out which one it is. One of those chairs.

You need to sit at a weird angle while you wait for it. That one arm resting on the table, the other hanging over the back of your chair position. Real power move.

The waiter brings it over, you thank them with a curt but friendly nod, finish your conversation with a decisive alpha point of fact, pick up the drink and just wet your lips a little. Just a tad. Don't go all in. Warn your mouth about what is going to happen.

Then take a sip. If you slurp, you're out of this hypothetical situation and don't come back. Just go.

If you chug it, you obviously can't and didn't read anything I just said and, for you, I'm sorry. I will provide this lecture as an audiobook at some point

Just pour a bit in your bouche. Just a bit. Amuse that bouche.

Do that for the next 20 minutes, then order another. Finish this one while they make that one.